Just when I think I've completely forgotten about this journal....I realize I need to return to it more than ever.

So I'm in the process of sorting things out where I left them so most entries are private for the moment, but once I figure out who's watching and who isn't I'll go back and make them friends only.

The warning? Whatever I right here is going to be the most raw, honest, soul-scraping and possibly offensive to those who don't like the unfortunate life paths I've chosen. Yes, I can admit that some of what I do to myself is "wrong" and I "should know better", but believe me, I am currently drowning in apathy more than anything else. I'll destroy myself if I want to...and what scares me the most is that I may just deserve every moment of it.

wheeeee....look at me!

One thing for sure, I won't make the same mistake twice. OK, maybe I will, but definitely not FOUR TIMES!

All entries past this one are locked.

Comment if you're interested in hearing more.